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I was the one who had to sift through and pick the hottest of the hot. I know that hot is relative and all inclusive depending on who you chat with, but for these purposes, lets talk about the "universally attractive" kind of hot. We want to pretend that we don't know what I'm talking about, but lets be real; we totally do.

Know this: the myth that "atypical" bodies can't be paired with "typically attractive" bodies is false. The fact that "fat guys bang 'hot' chicks" was one of the most powerful realizations I've had thus far.

So we're not allowed to ask how tall you are because we're trying to avoid you freaking out, but you're allowed to tell us what kinds of photos we post so you can make sure we're thin enough for you? Only replying to our messages every few hours or just once a day. Being ridiculously cutesy and coy with your messages. Glad you guys are close but also, get more friends. Chatting with us forever and ever and ever, and never asking us out.

There are only so many wink emojis and flirtatious "maybes" that you need to send me in one chat. Look, I'm not saying guys have to be the ones to ask us out all the time, but guys complain about women wanting to be pen pals. But if you're talking to us for days and days and we haven't made a move yet, someone has to and it has got to be you.

Women need to know that all bodies can be paired with all bodies. what I'm going to do now is flip the gender roles, so now the article is written by a male, and I want you to tell me what you think: Fat guys bang hot chicks... In line with the above paragraph, I knew that there would be someone that would find me attractive but the pool would be small (because of my body) and potentially full of chicks I didn't personally find sexy.

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